perfect love casts out fear


What is it about true love that makes it as equally exciting as it is terrifying? And what is it about us as humans that make us so eager to continuously plunge ourselves into that void of the unknown and to constantly seek it out?

We’ve all undoubtedly heard that saying that “love is the spirit’s recognition of its counterpoint in another.” Yet haven’t we all had experiences where we confused some other feelings for love? Where we kind of act like a child trying to force a square peg into the round hole?

Most anyone reading this has probably at one point been in a relationship with someone that seemed to have ‘love’ yet you probably realized in retrospect that it was not true love, but you were in love with the ‘idea’ of that person. Or perhaps your ego was in love with the inflated sense of pride it gained being with that person. Perhaps you were convinced your were in love with that person but what you really loved is what they could do for you or what you could gain from them. A feeling of security or the validation of self-worth they temporarily filled. They were just a band-aid that you thought could cover and heal a wound that in reality needed some stitches or perhaps even some extensive surgery followed by a long stay in the ICU.

Many people I see seem to bounce from relationship to relationship, never taking the time to define who they are as an individual, always seeking someone else to validate their sense of worth or purpose. Everyone wants to feel needed, wanted and loved however I believe we can’t experience real love until we first truly love ourselves. We cannot give what we do not have.

I think true love is quite different from these types of experiences. True love doesn’t seek to GET but it longs to GIVE. True love doesn’t have ulterior motives, it is just love for love’s sake. I believe that true love is unconditional and unless an intimate relationship parallels in a perfect way God’s love for us, it is not true love, but a counterfeit. One that will always leave us longing and seeking more, noticing the greener grass on the other side of the fence.

“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” – 1 Corinthians 13:4-8

Christian or not, I’m sure you’ve heard this scripture before. You have been to a wedding and heard it recited, or you’ve seen a picture on FB artistically quoting it. I think it is one of the most beautiful verses of scripture in the entire Bible, and the reason I feel this way is because it speaks of our highest calling in life – our calling to love. To love UNCONDITIONALLY.

There is no higher purpose for our life, in fact it is God’s ultimate commandment to us. To love him and to love one another. Christ dying on the cross for us, is the most powerful example the world has ever seen about true love and perfectly exemplifies how we must be willing to give it all and leave all the cards on the table to truly and powerfully express our love. This love is never more beautifully demonstrated than in a Godly relationship between a man and a woman. Our inner most desire is to feel love, to give love, to receive love, simply to BE LOVE.

So why can true love teeter between inexplicable bliss and bone chilling fear? I think it is simply the painstaking torment our everlasting spirits have temporarily residing in our physical reality. When we find true love we know we have found the ultimate pinnacle of life, and our flesh tells us this is temporary. If we put our happiness and fulfillment in the love we give and receive from another person, we feel that this love can be taken from us – this person could leave us, they could pass away or could simply stop reciprocating the love we give them. And this is terrifying, is it so terrifying in fact that many people completely give up on love, close themselves off from love or settle for good love, instead of waiting for and seeking out great love.

So how to we keep our true love fresh, powerful and burning with fiery intensity? I think it is simple. True love fills us deeply simply because it is a reflection, a powerful and intimate echo and external physical likeness of God’s love for us. True love is an act of worship to our God in Heaven, the Creator of the Universe. It fuels the fire of our spirits because it reminds us and shows us the reflection of the love our God has for us.

If we keep that in mind, we can love more freely, with the chains and shackles of fear being left behind. As the picture quote at the top says: PERFECT LOVE CAST OUT FEAR.When we find that person that truly is “our spirits recognition of its counterpoint in another” we can be free to love them the way we were created to love someone. The same way God loves us. With every part of our being, being ready to give it all and to give our own lives for the sake of another and not expecting anything in return. We can be free to love another the way they deserve to be loved. I believe when two people experiencing true love realize that their love for one another must come behind their individual love for God, that fire will never stop burning and it will become an all-consuming rage that spreads into every thing they do, to everyone around them. It will change their lives and ultimately change the world.

God Bless you Always,

Jason Herrington

Join our Movement to help Change the World at

6 comments on “A Lesson on LOVE

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Melissa shepherd on May 2, 2014 12:24 pm

Great post Jason! It’s only when we truly find Jesus and experience his love. That’s when we can love unconditionally . That’s when we learn to forgive and learn to love others the way god loves his people. When a man truly knows god he will treat his woman good because if he doesn’t the bible says the mans prayers will not be answered and things will not go well with him. God is a god of order and when he does things he does them perfect. You have to fall in love with Jesus in order to truly love.

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Terri Herrington on May 2, 2014 3:55 pm

Beautiful post! Once you get past the fear and open yourself to the possibilities….true love is limitless and joyous!

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jasonmherrington on May 2, 2014 4:18 pm

Thanks Melissa! Such spot on insight! I am really seeing the truth of what Jesus said in Matthew 6:33 “But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.” Wouldn’t be in the place I am in life without such great friends and awesome brothers and sisters in Christ like you. God Bless and thank you for all your friendship and support. 😉

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jasonmherrington on May 2, 2014 4:18 pm

Thank you Mom! I’ve had some pretty amazing parents that set such a powerful example to follow. Love you!

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Andrea Lopez on May 2, 2014 8:49 pm

Well said Jason and I agree with this post! I love how you mentioned that one can’t truly love without first loving themselves. Self worth and loving ourselves has to be present in order for us to love everything else about life. Also, how can one say they truly love God without loving themselves? I think this was a powerful post! Loved the song! Jaclyn has a very beautiful voice!

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jasonmherrington on May 3, 2014 10:28 am

Thank you so much Andrea, I’m glad you enjoy! I totally believe when we understand how much God loves us we get so filled up with love that we have so much filling over we can easily pour that love into other people!

“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” – John 3:16

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